Have you considered how trauma impacts your Inner Foundation and how that impact determines the quality of your life? Are you able to recall any difficult relationships or experiences from the past that made you feel threatened ashamed, humiliated, angry or sad? Do you feel it’s difficult for you to talk about certain moments or aspects of your childhood or adulthood? The reasons for that may be related to feelings of shame, humiliation, fear and in some cases due to Stockholm Syndrome. If you haven’t zoomed out and you are still reading this article, then that could be because this information is meant for you.
Did you know many of us did grow up in unhappy, unstable homes? Sadly, the truth is most of us suffered some kind of trauma, abusive or varying degrees of emotional neglect inside of the home. Trauma either derived from challenging environments caused by harsh discipline/authoritarian parent, parental neglect or as adults we may have experienced verbal or emotional abuse or violence from a partner, friend or boss. These experiences negatively impact your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual development, ultimately leading to a fragile Inner Foundation. They form the template of who you believe you are and of how you see other people. Much like a lens through which we see ourselves, other people and our place in the world. Today, finally, it is acknowledged that the common cause of virtually all afflictions, mental illness, physical disease and addiction is trauma.
Did you know the lens by which you see yourself today, your perception of your self-worth, originally formed during those periods of neglect and abuse? Emotionally mature parents are consciously aware that children have needs beyond food, clothes and shelter. Their parenting style is focused on providing safe, stable and friendly home environments that in turn guide their children to ask questions, to access a better appreciation of themselves and so develop a strong Inner Foundation. Unfortunately, emotional immature parents are the opposite. More self-centered and emotional unstable, these parents, unconsciously, do more harm than good to their children, as they are not able to establish an emotional bond with their child. As a consequence, these children grow up as adults with a fragile Inner Foundation, often presenting undesirable thought and behavioral patterns that can ultimately sabotage their life and relationships.
HEALING THE TRAUMA TO BECOME OUR TRUE SELF
Did you know the Inner Foundation is the most profound and important aspect of life? It’s your internal foundation that represents everything within you from birth to death. It is your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health. Our Inner Foundation is not identical for everyone but unique to that person and their biography. Instead, the quality of your life experiences, including trauma determines the development of your Inner Foundation and how strong or fragile your Inner Foundation is today.
You may wonder how can we become free from trauma and rebuild a strong Inner Foundation? In order to initiate such pivotal moment in your life you first need to acknowledge what thought and behavioral patterns are unhealthy and misaligned in your life today. Pay attention to your daily habits as they are the key measurable indicators showing what you need to change. This important process of self-discovery has the objective of understanding that these traumatic responses are not your true self but a consequence of unhealed past experiences. That you can work through this pain, partly through grieving and forgiveness, and learn from your suffering. That way stopping your perpetual suffering and inflicting pain upon others. This is an essential step in order to dissolve the “emotional baggage”, and thus become our true selves. Ultimately, working through trauma can teach us so much wisdom and reveal the purpose of our existence. If you feel ready for change, we invite you to read The Inner Foundation Book.
About The Writer
Susana Hancock is the author of the book The Inner Foundation- How Society impacts Your Inner foundation. She has a global professional experience of over twenty years, working in Europe and Asia in areas of leadership, staff training and personal development. Since 2016 Susana has been delivering professional training and coaching programs to individuals, schools, business and governmental organizations.