Do you have a genuine strong feeling of love and appreciation for yourself? Do you sense you are worthy of having the life you dream of? Do you know your life’s purpose and direction? Or, do you feel lost and confused about who you are and your life’s purpose? Why is it, that so many of us feel lost and confused not only about our life’s direction and purpose, but about who we truly are? Why do we have these feelings of isolation, sadness and low self-esteem?
One very concrete reason why, is because we did not have enough quality emotional intimacy with our primary caretakers and role models when we were growing up. We did not experience sufficient quality time with our primary carers (parents) to explore and understand who we truly are, what we think, feel, believe and want. Starting as early as our toddler years we may not have had someone help us facilitate that connection with who we are, our authentic selves. We did not learn how to listen to and connect with our body and it’s needs. We were not taught about our intuition – our internal guidance system and how to listen to it. We did not learn the vital importance of how connecting with our true self and our internal guidance helps us to develop a strong Inner Authority and build a strong Inner Foundation. Without having these emotionally mature role models in place, it is very understandable why we have so many teenagers and adults suffering both from low self-esteem, poor self-awareness and poor self-image.
The consequences in adulthood of having a fragile Inner Foundation.
Having entered the 21st Century, according to the World Health Organization (WHO) we are witnessing a worldwide epidemic of chronic degenerative diseases such as heart disease, cancer, diabetes, all of which a lifestyle related and preventable. These (heart disease, cancer, diabetes,) are the three biggest killers on the planet today. To make matters even worse there is a huge increase in and psychosomatic disorders such as stress, depression and suicide, among both the young and old. And according to a new report by the Center for Disease and Control (CDC) our society is now experiencing the highest rates of homicide and suicide among Gen Z and Millennial’s ever recorded. Are we questioning ourselves and society about why this is happening? Surely something must be terrible wrong if our young adults are committing suicide. How did we arrive here and how can we transcend this current awful situation?
Science tells us that our brain develops to 90% within the first five years of life. Early life experiences deeply impact brain development and the formation of neural pathways that influence the functioning of all bodily systems. Our past childhood experiences have a direct upon us as adults and how we relate to and perceive the world. There are countless scientific studies that demonstrate the relationship between early childhood experiences and how they deeply influence the quality of our adulthood life. One of the largest, most comprehensive and important studies of its its kind is the Kaiser Permanente ACE study. The objective of the study demonstrated how Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) directly and negatively impacted us as individuals in adulthood. The study records Adverse Childhood Experiences ranging from more extreme abuse such as physical, emotional and sexual, but importantly more subtle neglects such as emotional and physical neglect. It also includes common household dysfunctions such as substance abuse (e.g. alcohol, medication), divorce, incarceration and mental illness. The evidence is all around us.
Judging by today’s very high levels of addiction, depression, medication consumption, obesity and suicide among adults, it’s clear that many of us experience some level of Adverse Childhood Experience and so consequently a fragile Inner Foundation. From these past adverse experiences, there is a common tendency to have low levels of self-worth and self-esteem. Meaning, deep down at the sub-conscious level we believe a very strong life controlling belief that “we are not good enough, we are not worthy, we don’t deserve, we can’t” among other main, deeply rooted and deeply destructive life controlling beliefs. Living with these beliefs is overwhelming, draining and can make us feel like giving up.
As conscious adults, what can we do to rebuild a strong Inner Foundation?
We did not learn the importance of loving ourselves. We did not learn how to nurture self-respect and self-care. It may all seem hopeless to some readers, but having the awareness of the above and of what could have impacted your adult life is a very good starting point. We must develop awareness, the courage and commitment to begin the inner journey of rebuilding our Inner Foundation so we may develop healthy levels of self-esteem and self-love. In effect we become the role models we did not have and begin to nurture ourselves and be who we truly are. This internal work consists of an internal journey of Self-Discovery, Personal Development and later, Self-Actualization. This is what our Self-Empowerment work is about. There is professional support to assist you on your journey. If what you have read resonates with you, feel free to connect with us by writing a comment below and grab you free copy of Luke’s life changing book, “Own Your Power”.
Having a strong Inner Foundation is fundamental to reaching your full potential and life of happiness and satisfaction. Whatever you choose to believe, feel and act upon either moves you away from or towards your desired future. Without a a strong Inner Foundation supported by healthy habits, the chances of failure increase dramatically. Your mindset, beliefs and attitude are crucial for you to create and navigate a successful happy life. Are your beliefs supporting or sabotaging you from successfully moving from where we you today to where you want to be in the future?
Did you know that knowing yourself, trusting your internal guidance and believing in your decisions is the most empowering and liberating experience of personal growth? But if you cannot trust and accept yourself or you fear the consequences of your decisions, then you won’t be able to recognize and access your full potential. Today, many of us do not know ourselves deeply and so don’t trust ourselves or our decisions. Instead, we often rely on the opinion of others to make key life decisions. By looking outside to get approval or validation from others you became trapped, suffering from trying to fulfill societal and family expectations and demands. As a result, you lose sight of who you truly are and what is important to you. Instead you wear a mask to please others instead of having the courage to embrace your authenticity.
Have you consider having a strong Inner Foundation, your personal power can emerge to manifest your authentic self? How would that feel to you? Today you may believe within yourself something is not right and deep down you may feel powerless, not knowing how precious, powerful and wonderful you are! But have you considered wherever there is a internal crisis, there is also an opportunity for a powerful transformation towards rebuilding your Inner Foundation? This internal crisis is a natural, necessary and urgent wake up call to born out of an internal intuitive knowing, that things in your life must dramatically change. It’s a wake-up call for you to review your life! To (re)discover who you truly are and reevaluate what’s important to you! If our work resonates with you, then read The Inner Foundation Book.
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About The Writer
Susana Hancock is the author of the book The Inner Foundation- How Society impacts Your Inner foundation. She has a global professional experience of over twenty years, working in Europe and Asia in areas of leadership, staff training and personal development. Since 2016 Susana has been delivering professional training and coaching programs to individuals, schools, business and governmental organizations.